HOMETOWN Born in Englewood Colorado, Manhattan resident for nine years
NUMBER OF CHILDREN 2 boys, Max (6), and Sam (nearly 3)
DAY JOB At-home dad, Co-Organizer for the NYC Dads Group, writer and advisor to ThirdPath Institute
RELATIONSHIP STATUS Friends for 18 years, together for 12, married for 9
ON THE WEB www.nycdadsgroup.com
FAVORITE CHILD if applicable* Both boys have an equal opportunity to be my favorite, or least favorite, at any given moment.
HOW DO YOU COMBINE WORK AND FAMILY?
Some people call our arrangement “reverse-traditional.” My wife works full-time and I manage the care of our kids and our home during the week. That being said, my wife is very active with the kids in the mornings, when she gets home from work in the evenings, and on the weekends. Several years ago, I gave myself the gift of having a babysitter come over two afternoons per week, but she recently cut me down to one day! My little one started pre-school last year so I use some of that time, in addition to the one afternoon our babysitter still comes, to work.
WORST PARENTING MOMENT
I really don’t like when I find myself being the gatekeeper and making faces after my wife gets the boys dressed or when I see what she has decided to feed them for breakfast. Usually, her clothing choices and breakfast selections are perfectly fine, but perhaps not what I had in mind. More importantly, my negative responses deprive my wife of the opportunity to be the mother she wants to be, and the mother she wants our boys to see. I also lose the opportunity to have a parenting partner that feels confident in making parental decisions, and it’s certainly nice to have someone else that is ready, willing and able to clothe and feed our sons.
BEST PARENTING MOMENT
I’m happiest when the four of us are eating dinner together and sharing stories of their day. It seems like we’re doing something right when I can manage to cook a meal everyone will eat, my wife can manage to make it home in time for dinner, and my toddler can sit at the table without deciding that he’s “done” after two bites. Our goal is to create more of these moments over time.